The Next Show is All in the Bag

I love handbags. I love shopping. I hate handbag shopping. I can't do it online. I have to do it in store. I've got to touch the merchandise. My requirements are specific but today I tried to be open to what's in fashion. I really did. But I just can't do these open-top handbags. No zipper, no magnetic closure or no closure at all? The internal contents of your handbag all on display for anyone who wants to peek in? Nah, I think not. And as Anne Rice so aptly described in her novel "Interview with the Vampire" I realize how marked I am by my era. 

When You Want to Hug a Stranger in Dunkin Donuts

In Dunkin Donuts there was a Young Woman sitting at the table next to me. She was talking on her cell phone and upset because another girl had deliberately shoved her out-of-the-way to get on the bus. And in an I-can’t-take-it-anymore moment she shoved the girl back and they got into a fight. Tearfully she said, “This happens all the time. I don’t want to fight. This is not who I am. I’m sorry. This doesn’t happen when I’m with you. I feel safer with you.”

And How Are You Today? A Tale of Reverse Customer Service

First of all I had no business being in Macy’s, especially the 34^th Street Mothership. But I was in the neighborhood, I needed a bra, and so there I was strolling through the lingerie department like I had money and boobs.

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It’s Always the Year of the Asshole

At a recent comedy show there was a table of disruptive people. They weren’t heckling the comedians directly, just talking animatedly amongst themselves. This seemed odd since this wasn’t a random bar show. It was a fundraiser with tickets sold in advance. These people had chosen to be there and yet their incessant chatter created a distracting undercurrent of noise that lasted the entire show... 

At the Cleaners: How the Everyday Can Just Flat Out Get Away From You

I went to the cleaners the other day and as I pulled out my last item of clothing I saw a crumpled claim ticket in the bottom of the tote bag. I used to put my cleaners tickets on the refrigerator so I’d remember them, so of course I didn’t.  My refrigerator is a jumbled graveyard of baby pictures of grown people, save the date wedding invitations for divorced couples, calendars from the turn of the century, and business cards for defunct companies. I know. My refrigerator really needs to get its shit together. So I decided to put my cleaners ticket in the bottom of the bag of clothes to be taken out. Makes sense right? A good plan predicated on going to the cleaners on a fairly regular basis.

 

Bitch, Am I Boring You?

And the Search for a Therapist Continues

After our second session I fired my therapist. Two meetings are what it took for me to see we weren’t going to work out. And I’d really hoped we would.

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A Death in the Family

I found out about the death of a cousin on Facebook because that’s how we learn of these things now.

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Today is My Mom's Birthday and She's Not Happy About It

Today is my Mom’s birthday and she’s not happy about it. How can she be? She (and she is not alone in this) has succumbed to the constant subliminal and overt cultural messages that discount the value of older people in general and older women specifically.

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Don’t Hate on the Skinny Girl at the Gym

Photo by patrisyu.

Okay, we’re a few days in and you’re still up for making a good-faith effort on your New Year’s resolutions. If one of them is going to the gym, do yourself a favor. When you get there, please don’t hate on the skinny girl.

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